Don’t Be Afraid

Don’t be afraid to make the necessary changes in your life. When I went to therapy on Friday, I had to present one of my stuck points. I hated that session! My therapist, well with his help,  had me to rethink and come up with a replacement thought. The entire process had me drained and feeling like I am crazy. I know if you are suffering from
PTSD, you’ve probably felt like me if you are completing CPT therapy. It helped me to separate thoughts that I had combined together for some reason. I was anxious the whole time. At one point, I wanted to stop the session and move on to something else, but my therapist gently redirected me back to the task at hand.
I don’t like change. I never have. To me, I always feel vulnerable and like I’m under a microscope. I feel like my people can see everything about me that I don’t want others to know. It reminds me of a time when I was in high school. I was next up to give a speech. My teacher had a podium for the students to stand behind. I was very anxious. I began to panic as I walked toward the podium. When I reached the front of the class and started to stand behind it, I knocked the podium down and had the entire class laughing. From that day on…
I’m learning that change can be good. Staying in the same position or routine can sometimes cause a bit of trouble. Besides, I got so complacent with doing things the same way, I  never took the opportunity to learn new things. The routine turned into a habit caused me to think I was doing things right and others are wrong. I was afraid of failing. I felt I would be judged harshly by my peers. Today, I feel good about change in my life. I may feel uncomfortable, but when I feel it’s time, I take things slowly. I am discovering there are new and wonderful things for me to do!

Until next time,
Don’t be afraid of starting over or something new!

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